What turns me on about the opposite sex – A woman’s perspective

I love men. Not just the rugged handsome ones but all types of men. Their personalities can be sexy, the jobs they do can be sexy and even the type of musical instrument they play can all get me hot and bothered…

When it comes to my attraction levels with men I find things change the older I get.

While looks still do matter to me, they are much less important than they used to be. I don’t know if this is because I’m less shallow or just because my tastes have changed but it’s the way it is and I’m very happy with it!

Here is a list of some of the random things I find attractive in the men I meet, date or just perv at from afar! 😉

  1. Personality can be so much more attractive than looks. I know some guys find this hard to believe but for me it is 100% true. A confident man or even better a man who is confident and funny is a huge turn on, no matter what he looks like.
  2. Hairy chests! I love them, As soon as I see one I find myself imagining what it Hairy Chestwould be like to nuzzle up against it after hot steamy sex.
  3. Masculinity. Before I decide to sleep with a man I will picture myself in their arms. If the image makes me feel feminine and safe this is very sexy. He doesn’t have to have huge muscly arms but I do prefer them to be masculine in some way.
  4. Men’s chests in general…I love them!
  5. Bald heads…Phwoar!
  6. Big strong chunky legs. I live in the UK and over here we have some very sexy rugby players with nice big muscly thighs…Yum yum!
  7. More on personality. I pay attention to the way he talks to me, if he wont let me finish or talks over me it’s a no-no.
    If a guy listens to me and I feel I can talk to him honestly and feel a connection it is very attractive.
  8. Subtle dominance. I love it if he puts me in my place. I might be cheeky on purpose or I might say something without realizing it. If he calls me out on it, then it’s instantly a strong turn on. (Note I do not like domineering men but I do like men who don’t stand for any BS).
  9.  Nice teeth and lips are very hot and make me think about kissing and thinking about kissing makes me think about fucking and so it goes on…!
  10. If they are good kissers this makes me find their mouths even more attractive.
  11. Having a clean body, clean cock, tidied up and smelling nice
  12. Knowing what he wants. A man who knows what he wants and gets it is a major point of attraction.
  13. That super cool vibe. If he is comfortable in his own skin, I find it magnetic and want to spend more and more time with him
  14. The fact that they have a dick. I love dicks and just thinking about a man’s dick gets me thinking about what it would be like to feel it inside me.

Well I was going to stop but I got carried away!

So what do you think of my list? Do you have anything to add?

Love
Lola
PS – Check out my HUGE range of sex toys all at very low prices, treat yourself to a new plaything… You Deserve it! (Click here).

Can men and women be friends? A woman’s perspective

A woman’s perspective on the age old question of can men and women be friends without sexual attraction or even love getting in the way of the friendship…

There is a widely held belief that with both men and women that members of the opposite sex cannot be just friends. That platonic relationships between a man and a woman are impossible.

In my opinion this is a great shame as it dramatically reduces the amount of friends someone can have. Also there can be something very special in friendship between a woman and a man and to totally rule that out seems crazy to me!

So clearly I don’t buy into this belief but I can understand where it comes from.

For years I thought it was possible to have purely platonic friendships with myself and my guy friends, but a close male friend convinced me that this wasn’t accurate.

What he explained to me and what I’ve since experienced is that there will always be an element of attraction or sexual curiosity from one, the other or both people involved. (Maybe at the same or different times in the relationship).

Where I differ from the people that think men and women should not be friends is that I think it is perfectly fine for friends to experience some sort of attraction at some time during their friendships. I think this is normal, natural and nothing to stress about.

Well I would qualify that slightly. Its nothing to worry about in a healthy respectful friendship where neither side has ulterior motives, like wrecking a relationship for example.

I think what is more important than the existence of attraction is the way the friends behave with each other.

If both men and women in this type of friendship are very clear about the signals they send out, this is a great start. Especially if one person is aware that the other has feelings for them.

For example if I have a male friend who I know finds me attractive I would be careful how I behave with him. I wouldn’t sit on his lap at a party or do a sexy dance in front of him when I hit the dance floor.

(I found learning how to do this a bit tricky. Sometimes I would be doing things that I thought were platonic but were misread by others. So now I tread carefully but try not to stress too much about it).

That way as long as I send out only very clear platonic signals I have done nothing to encourage the attraction he feels for me. Anything else is his responsibility and beyond my control.

Of course it is really important not to let these situations get out of hand. If the attraction gets too much a good friendship can be lost and that is always a sad thing when it occurs.

It is also important if there is a partner involved in one or both sides of the friendship. Partners not involved in the friendship need to feel loved and respected as well. This can be hard if they know their partner’s friend is in love with them!

So to sum this up….

What I am saying is that I think men and women can and should be friends.

What I am also saying is that this can be complicated and as such needs some thought and discussion.

As always there is always room for learning, growth and good communication nearly always makes things better.

What do you think about this? Do you have anything to add?

Love
Lola
PS – Jack blogged about this from a man’s perspective, check it out here…

PPS – Have you checked out the Secret Erotica community yet? It’s awesome! Find out more on this link…

Learn How to Deep Throat and Blow His Mind!

Deep throat blow jobs – men LOVE then. They take practice and a bit of hard work but having this power over a guy is well worth the effort in my opinion…

Before you learn how to deep throat you need to learn exactly what it is! It is the art/skill of swallowing a man’s cock deep into your throat as you suck him off.

To do it you need to be able to train yourself not to react when your gag reflex is triggered by his dick hitting the back of your throat.

The second thing you need to know about deep throating is that most guys love receiving a deep throat blow-job. Especially since it reminds them of those funny movies that they watch on certain websites 😉

But deep throating is an advanced sexual skill. If you are a newbie to this then I advise learning how to give good blow jobs first.

How to do it, step by step

First of all the goal is to be able to take the cock past the back of your mouth, and keep going so it goes down your throat. Normally this would cause you to gag (like putting two fingers down your throat) but with practice this will stop happening (or at least happen a lot less often).

Before you go any further just be aware this isn’t easy. So its only worth trying if you really want to get good at giving amazing blow jobs! Also it can be a little embarrassing and awkward as you learn, so its best to try it out with a supportive partner.

Basically there are no special techniques, all you have to do is try swallowing his cock. At first this will make you gag, want to vomit and even panic a bit.

Don’t worry! Just stop, take a little breather and try again. Focus on relaxing and take it very slowly. Also make sure he doesn’t thrust into you at the wrong movement or he might end up covered in vomit! (I suggest telling him to take it easy as you are practicing. We all know how carried away guys can get when they are horny!)

As you practice, you will notice the gag reflex is less powerful and happens less often. As this happens you will notice you can take his cock deeper into your throat without feeling like you are going to choke.

As with most things in this life the more you practice the easier it gets. You will find yourself being able to take his cock deeper into your throat until you can swallow his whole cock easily.

Once you get this skill handled it is a lot of fun, not just for him but for you as well. Men love to get deep throated and knowing you have the power to blow his mind will be a huge turn on for you.

As with all sexual techniques learning how to deep throat is a combination of communication, trust and lots of yummy practice. The sooner you start and the more you practice the better you will get.

If you have any questions please feel free to ask below…
If you have any extra advice to share I would love to hear it…

Love
Lola
PS – If you haven’t checked out the sexiest community online click here to find out more…

PPS – If there is a special man in your life why not treat him to a sexy new toy to play with? While you’re at it, why not treat yourself to one was well…?

Tips for the Ladies

Ladies, check out this post and learn how to have as much fun as possible in the Secret Erotica community and sexy library…

How to get the most fun out of Secret Erotica

Welcome to the Secret Erotica blog. I wrote this post to try and help make sure you get as much fun as possible out of our secret sexy community. So far we’ve found that most of our female members come to the site for four main reasons:

1. To read erotic stories.

2. To share their own erotic stories.

3. To chat and interact with like-minded people.

4. To find and meet a real world playmate.

The simple steps below will help you on your Secret Erotica journey to find fun and fantasy in whatever way you choose…

Step one – If you haven’t done it all ready claim your free membership! Click here to find out more or watch this short video to help you make up your mind.

Click here to claim your FREE membership

Step two – To read erotic stories, once you have created an account visit the sexy stories library and browse to your heart’s content! If you find some stories that you really like please be kind and put a nice comment in the replies section so the author knows you enjoyed their work.

Step three – To share your own writings and sexy stories, you will find easy to follow instructions to help you on your way. Once you have posted your story make sure you share it a few groups to get it seen by lots of our horny members!

Step four – To find people to chat with, search the groups menu and find the areas that interest you the most. Join in and see where it takes you!

Step five – To find a real world playmate, the first step is to make sure your profile and your avatar are funny/sexy/interesting. Then join in the community activity or browse our members and see who tickles your fancy.

Top Tip – One thing we’ve noticed is that members who write and then share sexy erotic stories get a lot more attention than those who don’t!

There you go. Some nice easy tips to help you get the most from the site.

Have a good one!
Jack
PS – Have you had any good or bad experiences with sexy online communities? Why not share your story below…

Advice for the Guys

Guys we have worked hard to make this site as fun as possible. So check out this quick guide and learn how to get the most from it as easily as possible…

How to have a much fun as possible here on our site

  • If you want to flirt with lots of sexy people?
  • If you want to read very naughty erotic stories?
  • If you would like to share some of your own sexy stories?
  • Or if you would like to find an online or real world playmate?

Then check out these easy to follow steps to help you get the most out of Secret Erotica as quickly as possible.

First things first create your free account! – If you aren’t a member yet then you should be. ALL the really good stuff is hidden behind closed doors and your membership is the key to those doors. If you’re not sure then check out this video to help you decide either way…

Click this link and grab your FREE membership

Upload an Avatar – No matter what you are doing on the site. Step one is always to upload an avatar. It doesn’t have to be of you. It can be sexy, funny, or both but you really need to get one added as an avatar is the best way to stand out from the crowd.

If you want to flirt with lots of sexy people – Once you’ve added your avatar, add some interesting
information to your profile then, join some of the groups, and start interacting with the other members.

Top tip – Use the keyword cloud on the right hand side. Pick a word that turns you on, click on it and see what you find.

If you want to share your own erotic stories – First add your story, then share it in the library, the groups and the main activity wall so lots of other members will get to read it as well! Don’t worry if you are a newbie writer we have a group to help you out and lots of good advice to get you started… Just go for it!

If you would like to find an online or a real world playmate – You need to do a little bit of everything listed above. Definitely make sure your avatar and your profile is as sexy/funny/interesting as possible. Definitely join some groups and start having fun with other members. Also you really should think about writing a story and adding it to the library. Using a horny fantasy to interest your playmates is a sure fire way to meet some cool people to play with!

Can you think of anymore? If so add your suggestions to the comments section below and I will update this list.

I hope this helps.

Have a good one!
Jack